Funniest Dentist Jokes to Crack You Up

I think it is universally agreed that dentist visits are the worst. Sitting there with your mouth open while someone has their fingers and tools in your mouth? I would rather sit here and complain about toothache all my life. But, then again nothing is better than a perfect smile. We cannot avoid going to the dentist but we can laugh about it and show off our perfect teeth while doing so.

We have curated the funniest Dentist jokes that shall surely uplift your grim mood. No joke is a bad joke when it can be aid of enjoyment for both the dentists and the patients.

Prepare to burst into laughter with our funniest dentist jokes and experience the lighter side of the dentistry profession.

How to Use Funny Dentist Jokes

Pretty simple, do not tell them to your dentist because at the end of the day they are the ones with power over your whole mouth.

Other than that they are pretty harmless and good for a few laughs in gatherings. They will definitely make everyone burst with laughter because nothing is better than making fun of mutual pain.

Clean Dentist Jokes for Kids

  • A man walks to a dentist’s clinic and asked the receptionist at the desk to make an appointment. The receptionist replied, “I’m sorry but the dentist is gone right now he-” the receptionist was interrupted, “Thank you! When will he be gone again?”


  • What would a judge say to a dentist? Do you swear to tell the tooth and nothing but the tooth?


  • My dentist told me “I need crowning”, I replied, flipping my hair “I know, right?”


  • Do not be rude to your dentist because he has fillings, too.


  • Dad asks his son, “Has your tooth stopped hurting now?”
    Son replies, “I don’t know it is with the dentist”


  • Dan: What is a dentist’s favorite time of the day?
    Belle: I don’t know, what is it?
    Dan: Tooth hurty (2:30)


  • Mike: what is the similarity between stars and false teeth?
    Alex: No idea
    Mike: They both come out as the night falls


  • Laurel: Knock knock!
    Sandy: Who is there?
    Laurel: Dishes
    Sandy: Dishes who?
    Laurel: Dishes how I talk since I got braces


  • A dentist asks Johnny what kind of filling would he like in his tooth. Johnny replies, “Chocolate”.


  • Patient: I have a bad tooth and it hurts all the time
    Dentist: You don’t have to worry I will pull it out, it will only take five minutes
    Patient: and how much will it cost me?
    Dentist: Ninety dollars
    Patient: Ninety dollars for a five minute job?!
    Dentist: I can do it really slowly if you want


  • Peter: what is an orthodontist’s favorite game to play?
    Jane: What is it?
    Peter: Tooth or dare!


  • James: What is the first thing the dentist said during an earthquake?
    Paul: I have no idea, what did he say?
    James: Brace yourself


  • Anne: Why did the mobile phone go to the dentist?
    Taylor: I don’t know, why?
    Anne: It had a Bluetooth


  • Anne: What did the dentist say to the computer?
    Taylor: I don’t know, Anne
    Anne: This will not hurt a byte


  • Rachel: What do you call a dentist that does not like tea?
    Rory: You tell
    Rachel: Denis


  • What glues your teeth together? Toothpaste!


  • Why did the doughnut go to the dentist? To get a filling.


  • Which is the wisest fantasy figure? The tooth fairy, because she has a lot of wisdom teeth.


  • Why do vampires need gum all the time? They have bat breath.


  • What do you call an astronaut’s cavity? A black hole!

Dirty Dentist Jokes for Adults

  • Dentist: How did you lose three teeth at once?
    Patient: My wife made beef steak and it’s really hard to eat
    Dentist: Weird, you could have said no
    Patient: I did, hence three broken teeth, doc.


  • Maria: I met a really cute Russian dentist, his name is Anesthesia. I thought he could be the one
    Ella: What happened?
    Maria: I did not feel anything


  • A boy and a girl are on a date that goes well so they end up going to the lady’s house. One thing leads to another. The guy takes off his shirt and then washes his hand. Then he takes off his pants and washed his hands again.

    Seeing his behavior the girl says, “Let me guess, you are a dentist?” The boy replies, “Yes, how did you know?” Girl responds, “Simple, you keep washing your hands”. When they were done the girl says, “You must be a really good dentist”. The dentist replies, “What makes you say that?” To which the girl says, “Because I did not feel a thing”


  • A lady visits her dentist. When he starts working she grabs him by his crotch. The dentist says, “Excuse me Miss but you are holding me by my private parts”. The lady replies, “I know, this is to make sure we are not going to hurt one another”.


  • A woman is at the dentist’s getting her tooth drilled. She screams in pain, “God! I would rather have a child” The dentist responds, “For that, let me just reposition this chair”.


  • A patient went to his dentist’s appointment. The dentist made him sit in the chair and said, “Sorry but I must have my drill before we begin” To which the patient irritably replies, “What kind of doctor are you? Can’t you pull my tooth without rehearsing it first?”

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